Read the following paragraph and revise it. (1)The ad with the father and his daughter effectively convinces people to get the flu vaccine. (2)Its purpose is to encourage parents to get flu shots for their children. (3)The target audience is parents of young children. (4)The text, which tells how serious flu can be, works with the art to accomplish this purpose. (5)Most people consider “young” to mean under the age of thirteen. (6)The father holds his daughter protectively, sending a clear message: “If you are a good parent, you will do this.” (7)The media technique that is used is universal appeal. (8)All good parents want to protect their children, the ad suggests, and getting flu shots is one way to do this.

How should you improve sentence 1?
Where should you move sentence 4 to improve organization?