If you're one of my close friends, please don't read this :) I'm messed up haha. Am I the only one who craves pain? Like, you'll be hating your life one second, then the next second you're wishing it was worse. Or, when you're experiencing the pain you only have two thoughts: "I hate this" and "I deserve this". Or when you have best friends who are depressed, and you have to be their rock, and they'll be like "I ing hate my life" seconds after you put all of your energy into trying to make them happy, and you'll be depressed as ***k but they're all giggly and **it when you can't figure out when or if you're actually happy.